Sunday 30 September 2012

She cried more, more, more

Thank you, Mr Forecaster.
He told everyone that if they were going to go out this weekend they should go on Saturday because it would be sunny.
And they obeyed.
And so we had one of those lovely busy days when lunchtimers went for soup and jacket potatoes. Oh and panini.

Of course because Mr Forecaster told everyone to go out on Saturday we may have a very quiet day on Sunday. If everyone toes the line.
Let's hope there are some rebels out there.

Wednesday 26 September 2012

Can't get used to losing you

Very sad news that Andy Williams has died.
I had the pleasure of meeting him once a few years ago when he was doing a round of promotional interviews. He was utterly charming.
He made a great impression by being one of only two people ever to tell me that I'm pretty.

I married the other one.

Tuesday 25 September 2012

Show time

Back in July (17th) I steamed a hundred plus spears of asparagus for the Channel 4 programme The Food Hospital. In a Worcestershire field. 
I was also talked into peeing in a pot in a portaloo (noone can argue that I don't attempt alliteration) with other 'volunteers'.
The result of this foray into tv will be shown on Weds 3rd October at 8pm.
Is it appropriate to gird my loins?

Sunday 23 September 2012

Bjork day

So that's it. We've said goodbye to the third of our three girls who are off to take up their university places. One went to Cardiff last week and the other two are heading for Bristol and Cambridge. I am hoping they'll come back to us during their holidays next season. But I shall not hold my breath. They are, after all, in their late teens and there may be other offers...

Today it rained. And it was oh so quiet. 

Friday 21 September 2012

Sauce

Mary's made one of her special soups which we've called Mellow Fruitfulness. This tells you nothing about it so there are obvious questions from those wanting a bowl. One lady asked and I told her that it was a rich tomato and autumn veg. Very warming and hearty. 
She asked about the tomato content. Her stomach wasn't up to much tomato, she said. I gave her a little to try and she said she had better go for the homecooked ham and cheddar panini instead. Her two companions had the soup.
Seconds after I'd taken out her lunch she was back at the counter.
Asking for ketchup.


On Monday a man came to the counter and announced that he'd come to collect his wife's knickers.
He was joking of course. But so nice to know that he'd read the blog....

Tuesday 18 September 2012

Diet Another Day

This afternoon a lady asked for lemon with her tea. 
She said she loved lemon so instead of the usual two slices I gave her four - pretty much half the fruit. A few minutes later she asked if she could buy a whole lemon. Her husband squeezed it all into her tea. Apparently she eats a whole lemon every day as others might eat an orange. 
"Do you get lots of strange people like us in here?" he asked.

Another couple took a table in the conservatory. The husband came to the counter to order.
"Two teas please," he said. Then, looking at the cakes, added: "we can't have anything else because it's Tuesday."
He told me he's following an "alternate day diet" he'd seen on the tv. The idea is that they eat very little on a Tuesday and Thursday - 600 calories apparently is what they manage on. But just on those two days.
I took their teas to their table. 
His wife asked me to wrap up a piece of carrot cake to take away.  
"For tomorrow" she said. 

Saturday 15 September 2012

You say tomato

Busy and lovely today but my favourite customer was a three year old boy.
His dad had ordered him a half sandwich of ham. Our sandwiches are served with a salad garnish and a few crisps. I asked if he'd enjoyed it.
"Yes," he said. "But it had pineapple."
His dad interrupted and told him it was tomato.
"Don't like Momato" he said, shaking his head sadly. And eating his crisps.

Friday 14 September 2012

T leaf

I have a set of wooden scrabble tiles and holders which we use to name items on the counter.
One says "SHORTBREAD" and sits in front of an old sweet jar full of bags of handmade biscuits. One says "TIPS" and sits hopefully in front of a china pin tray. The third says "FUDGE". It's not an order.

People inevitably like to play around with the tiles. They have most fun with TIPS and we don't mind at all because a) that's what they're there for and b) they usually feel obliged to drop in some change once they've had their way with the letters.
This afternoon it was noted that the "P" from TIPS had migrated. We now had SHORPBREAD and TIS.
But this also meant that SHORPBREAD was missing a T. 
Of all things to go missing in a tea room.
The T was discovered in late afternoon under a basket of cards close to the TIS. 
I think I can work out what someone was trying to do....


Wednesday 12 September 2012

A Merry Band

A lovely day with a right mix of customers.
When I arrived to open up a group of 20+ were parking their cars. They set off on a 2 and a half hour walk and came to us for lunch. All very appreciative. All sat in the garden.
First visitors included several pairs of ladies for coffee and chat and a group of  3 mums with 4 toddlers after their swimming lesson.
A couple from Kent asked for cheese with their fruit scones instead of jam and cream.
Two Chinese teenagers studying at Birmingham University ordered coffee and lunch and confirmed that my Chinese sign does indeed say Garden Tea Rooms. Something of a relief since it could say anything... And it was doubly confirmed later this afternoon by a Chinese couple living here and their friend visiting from Beijing. 
A minibus in the Court was carrying either Dutch or Finnish visitors, depending on who you asked.
Four very pretty young women in floaty dresses had tea and cake after a University photo shoot.

Customers of the day, though, were the two women who ordered tea and cake, then spotted the Afternoon Tea deal (tea for two, two scones with jam and cream, two cakes for £10) and chose that instead. 
When it was delivered to the table on a tiered cake stand and mismatched china plates they said they were very pleased with their decision.  
But one of them was overheard to say that she hoped her gastric band wouldn't burst.

Tuesday 11 September 2012

Not in its element.

We've had another mystery shopper report delivered. This one is from late July. All good. We greeted them with a smile, served things at the right temperature and very quickly (phew) and "the staff looked clean and hygienic".  The place, they added, felt comfortable and relaxing.
They also commented that we don't wear name badges. Should we?

Water heater news changes daily. It's working, then it isn't. It's had the spare part and is heating water again. Then it isn't. This morning I'd have written that the new something-board has been fitted by the doc and we're back to normal but I've just been told that the new board-thingy is flashing up FAULT again.
So.
Square one it is then.

Sunday 9 September 2012

T. Witts

Extraordinarily busy.
There were eight of us working today and we were flat out from 11.30 until the sign came in at 5.
At the start of the day the fridges groaned with four-pinters of milk but of course it wasn't enough. Why is it never enough?
There was just one message left in the visitors book.
In huge capitals was written: HAVE HAD A VERY GOOD DAY.
It was written by T. Watts.
Although Mr or Mrs Watts had omitted the full stop after their initial.

Saturday 8 September 2012

Bocker Glory

The day was forecast fine but started with a chill in the air.
The first person through the door was a lady who was feeling the cold and ordered soup. Courgette and pea. At half past ten.  A record we think.
It was village fete day when usually we take a hit and go quiet in the afternoon. Not today though. Today lunch went on and on. Afternoon Tea left the cake display needing several refills. The understudy water heater acted admirably and saw us through one of the busiest days of our season.

In mid afternoon during a short lull I was called over to the front of the counter by Nancie. She tilted her head down. Pointing with her eyebrow. Sort of. And she had a strange look on her face. I looked down. On the floor of the tea room was a large pair of black knickers.
I'm going to write that again because I still can't quite believe it.
On the floor of the tea room was a large pair of black knickers.
Primark. Size 16-18.

Now we have a lot of lost property. Walking sticks, jackets, mobile phones, cameras, hats. With the clothing we generally hang it on the coat hooks for the owner to spot.

We didn't do that with the knickers.
But we did look at everyone sideways as they sipped their tea.

Friday 7 September 2012

Two's company.

We have lots of unsolicited 'phone calls.
Really. Lots of them.
At least four every day either from people from energy companies or telephone companies who always ask us how we are and we want to say, "it's lunchtime, we're BUSY, how are you?". There's at least one a week asking if I want to sell the business.
Add in those awful recorded 'phone calls about PPI or banks or accidents we may or may not have had and we're forever answering the 'phone and groaning.
Sometimes, though, they make us laugh.
Last week we had one asking if we wanted to merge with another company. Nancie told them I was busy, which I was, and could they call back (great).  We spent the rest of the afternoon deciding who we'd like to merge with? Because clearly we'd be able to choose.
John Lewis came out top.
But a discount in M&S would be handy too. It's such a tricky decision.

Am waiting for them to call back to discuss terms.

Thursday 6 September 2012

The faucet saga

This morning the water heater stopped working again.
Doctor came again.
Tutted a bit.
He says he has two more things to try.
The forecast for the weekend is really good which means we'll need lots of hot water.
Will I have to buy another?

Wednesday 5 September 2012

Life is Sweet

What a great day.
The water heater is saved.
It's heating water and everything.
It's smiling back at me with the word "ready" lit up.
Thank you to the water heater doctor who turned into a surgeon overnight.

Tuesday 4 September 2012

Not so green tea.

News on the water heater isn't really awful. Yet.
The doctor thinks he can save it. He's ordered a part (part =£4) which will be delivered tomorrow (delivery = £12.50). If it's the right part then we can stop boiling kettles and sapping the planet's energy.
If it's not then we may need a second opinion.

Today two ladies in their twenties had our special Afternoon Tea for Two. They sat at a table in the garden and ate their cake x 2 and scones x 2 and drank their tea for two.
Then they moved tables and ordered the same thing again.
My kind of people.

Monday 3 September 2012

In hot water (or rather..)

The water heater started complaining this morning.
And then at lunchtime it went on strike.
The back-up water heater clearly doesn't like being an understudy and refused to go on when it was called. I shall be having words with it tomorrow. Words like team. And let down. And disappointment. 
And so today we boiled kettles to fill the teapots and fortunately (?) we weren't too busy.
The water-heater doctor arrived as I was leaving.  
I fear it won't be good news...