Which came first?

What constitutes a menagerie?
A cat and a few wasps?
A cat, a few wasps and a chicken?
Over the last few days we've been joined in the garden by a beautiful white hen.
The cat sits and watches her.
The customers watch the cat and the chicken.
And try to avoid the wasps.
We think the chicken arrives and departs throught the gate in the walled garden.
It doesn't cross any roads.

A*

Two days of rain + one day of no-rain = two quiet days + one VERY run-out-of-bread busy day.
Multiplied by jacket potatoes.
Because it wasn't quite warm enough.
Add scones. Because it is technically still summer.
Equals the need for a glass of red.

Correct.

Wet

I have to go back to 2012 to find a rainy Bank Holiday Monday.
So I can't really resent the weather and its effect on trade today.
Especially as yesterday was BUSY. Properly busy. Ten-members-of-staff-plus-all-my-family-roped-in-to-help busy.
But then yesterday it didn't rain....

Deposit and the Bank

August, what a month you are. Since I have been blog-lazy I shall try to sum you up:

- Tea rooms are adopted by a local cat who relishes the attention from customers and rewards us by throwing up entrails in the conservatory. The people who've booked "a table in a nice position" just laugh.
- The health inspector pays a surprise visit. Thankfully not on cat-sick day. All fine. Brings leaflets about new regulations coming in later this year. My winter challenge.
- Someone yells in the Visitors' Book "MEND THE ROAD".
- the lawnmower chucks a stone at the conservatory and breaks one of the large panes. We stand and watch and listen as it crackles into a thousand pieces (I didn't count them).
- We host a Christening. A neighbour chooses this day to light a bonfire. The wind brings ash and bits of paper into the garden. No planes have to be grounded but it's close.

And now we've reached the final Bank Holiday of the season.
And the Art Fair is on in the Church.
Which means it'll be extra busy today.
Better get on...

Red Blues

Red onion marmalade is magic.
In several ways.
It's "magic" in a seventies-sitcom-catchphrase-way in the cheddar sandwiches.
It's magic in the Harry Potter way. It just disappears.
But the frustrating thing about it is that however many red onions I slice & caramelise I only ever seem to be able to make one jar. A sort of reverse Sorcerer's Apprentice.

Business as Usual.

Now that was a weekend.
Yesterday morning I leapt out of bed (highly unusual) to make fifty meringues (they take an AGE to cook) and seventy smoked salmon blinis and several lemon drizzle cakes (lost count).
I prayed for the rain to stop.
We polished all the cutlery, folded all the napkins, and prayed that the rain would stop.
We cut up strawberries and cucumber for the Pimms glasses and glanced outside to see whether the rain had stopped. It hadn't.
We set the tables in the conservatory and set up the wedding cake.

The groom popped in to ask if anyone had an appropriate 'phone charger.
One of my young staff rang home and asked her dad to bring hers. He did.
The groom showed us a sheaf of papers and asked if we thought his speech might be too long. It wasn't.
At two o'clock Louisa, the bride, arrived at the church. In glorious sunshine and a stunning long lace dress. The rain had stopped.
Granted it rained later but someone had thought to give the newlyweds a couple of gorgeous umbrellas.
And it didn't rain for long.
Actually we were grateful for the rain because it cooled the temperature in the conservatory and meant we weren't terribly busy in the rest of the tea rooms.


This morning the bride's mother vacuumed all the confetti from the floor of the conservatory.
The bunting and flowers were gone.
We had a very busy day inside and out and the sun shone all day.

On top of it all?

Tomorrow Louisa and Alex will be married.
This evening the conservatory has been decorated with pretty white bunting and old white tablecloths.
We need the sun to shine, but not so much that we fry in the heat. Although Louisa has bought some beautiful fans to grace the tables should the ladies start to "glow".
I am going to bed early to prepare myself for making meringues.
And blinis.
And putting their wedding cake together....