Quite a blow.

The wind was the issue of the day.
We couldn’t keep the gate open, it acted like a sail and broke from any usual moorings to slam shut. I called home and George brought solutions.
It broke the gate to the Court stables which had to be boarded up.
It blew over much of the garden furniture, even some of the bigger wooden benches.
Louise arrived for work at 1030, “it’s chair-mageddon out there,” she said.
We haven’t been busy but we did have a 70th birthday lunch to host. The birthday girl (actual birthday on Tuesday) thought she was attending her son in law’s celebration (actual birthday today).
There was a battle to pay the bill but Dad had made it clear to me from the start that he would be paying. When I gave him the total he told me he was very surprised, that he thought it would be much more.
This might have something to do with the fact that I’ve since realised I forgot to charge them for the birthday cake.
I wish I were better at this.

To be blunt

Our knives are sharp. 

The promised mutiny in the kitchen has been avoided.

A man (early thirties?) with a rolling box of tricks came to spend a couple of hours sharpening all our kitchen and serving knives which were in a pretty poor state. He arrived later than planned (also in a bit of a state) so lunchtime service had to go on around him. 

He apologised for his late arrival saying that he lives on a houseboat and had fallen in the canal that morning.

We liked him a lot. He was seriously into how the whole knife-sharpening thing works, used words I’d never heard and didn’t understand; told us which were our best knives and how to take care of them; told us that some people spend hundreds on a knife and then ruin it in the dishwasher. 

He told us that he used to work in a New Age shop and he learnt his new trade when his hairdressing partner couldn’t find anyone cheap enough or quick enough to sharpen the salon scissors. “I’m pretty much unemployable, as you can see,” he said, pointing to his clothing, “so it suits me to work like this”.

He told us that he doesn’t call her his girlfriend (“makes me sound like a teenager”) and when he refers to his “partner” people assume he’s gay. “I should marry her,” he said, “that would make things easier because then I can call her my wife.”

We suggested he didn’t tell her that when he was down on one knee.

Our pleasure

I have sore feet and anxiety about how busy we’re going to be tomorrow.
Naomi is bringing the last of the Simnel cakes for the year and whilst I have things made of chocolate I don’t have any actual chocolate cake.
This is a stupid, unforgivable oversight and I shall berate myself until I find something else to worry about.
This though, written on a napkin and left on a table, made me smile:

The cold, hard truth

The water boiler is on the blink. Not ideal for a bank holiday weekend but we’re using the ancient faithful one as a back-up and she seems to be holding up.
This week I looked at the forecast of a sunny Easter weekend and, using all the nine years experience I now have about how much ice cream we sell during school holidays, especially warm, sunny ones I  was organised enough to order 18 boxes of Bennetts (local and fabulous) small tubs.
That’s probably the most I’ve ever ordered.
It arrived on Tuesday.
On Tuesday afternoon I thought I’d better order a few more boxes just to be on the safe side.
They arrived on Thursday.
Today I have panic ordered another TWENTY ONE BOXES.
My years of so-called experience have counted for nothing.

Welcome to Easter

Today Naomi delivered the first of our Simnel cakes. 

We love them. 

Customers love them. 

They look like this. 

Fault line

Card machine was out of action again until 2.30 yesterday afternoon.
Liam said it was the most frustrating job he’s ever worked on.
He won’t forget us in a hurry as he was working on it for three days.
I am amazed that so many people still carry cheque books.
Thank goodness.

Countdown Conundrum

Originally the date we were leaving the EU was the end of March so for weeks the daily news gave me a rather helpful countdown to the start of our season.
As a result I was more organised than I’ve ever been.
Now the EU has given us a new deadline.
The last week of October.
Which is when we close for Winter.
On my way home yesterday a commentator said “we have twenty eight weeks until the end of October”.
Twenty eight weeks of the season left.
Will our cake ballot box have to come out of storage in that time?

All sorts.

We remained without a card machine for much of the day (cue scrabbling around for change and hidden notes in the bottom of bags and pockets) but outreach engineer Liam thinks he may have found the problem and we took two whole card payments before we closed.
A warmer, sunnier day during which a customer told me how she likes to dress up her two dogs in fairy outfits.

Line of Duty

The phone hasn’t worked for two days.
Calls are being diverted to my mobile but the bigger issue is that the card machine (which uses the phone line) hasn’t worked for two days.
This can be a real problem since most of us don’t carry much cash any more.
Today two customers came up with their own solution. They transferred money straight to our account from their phones.
Isn’t technology rubbish/wonderful?

Bob’s your uncle

Saturday.
The sun was shining and we expected to be busy but we were surprised by a group of lycra clad cyclists who arrived before we’d even opened.
I couldn’t turn them away.
Cyclists are cake eaters.
A couple arrived soon after, “We followed the cyclists,” they said, “they always know the best places for refreshments.”
Then another couple.
We still hadn’t officially opened.
Then a man and his dog came in.
“I’m in shock,” was his opening statement, “I’ve just found my own name on a headstone in the churchyard. Robert Ward. It says he died in the mid 19th century.”
I told him the Wards were the Earls of Dudley, and this could be his ancestral home. He looked sceptical.
“I think we’d have been the poor relations,” he said.

I went in early this morning to set up because my Australian friend, Kendall, whom I haven’t seen since we were teenagers, was coming to visit. I wanted to be able to have as long as possible to catch up with her before the lunchtime rush. Lauren said she’d hold the fort behind the counter and would come and get me if she needed to.
Kendall, her friend Siobhan and I sat in the conservatory drinking coffee and talking about odd names for children.
Lauren came to my table at about 11o’clock.
Bearing news.
The environmental health officer had arrived to do an inspection.
(Deep. Breath.)
I answered his questions, showed him what he asked to see, wondered what he was thinking, worried I’d missed something.
He went to sit down to complete his report.
Then he called me over.
We went through his comments.
Then he said it was lucky for me that it was after midday.
I didn’t understand and my heart was beating so loudly I could barely hear him anyway.
He said that if it had been before midday he would have told me I had a zero rating.
I still didn’t understand.
“And then I would have said, ‘April Fool’,” he said.
He gave us the top rating but my nerves were shredded.
Next year I may decide not to open on 1st April.